Discover the beauty in agreement with him to find the midpoint of a complicated conversation. We are angry, frustrated, hurt by the attitude or word of partner, there are two things you can do, deal with or circumvent.

However, in a relationship, conflicts should be overcome and not be avoided. Even if the relationship was getting worse, there’s still a way to fix it.

John Gottman, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Washington and author Nan Silver, wrote that married couples with healthy relationships will choose the right words and attitude when involved in the debate.

There are four ways that can be applied to improve the uncomfortable situation in your marriage relationship:

1. Establish open communication
Be open and express feelings or your opinions. If caught in a dispute, each individual has a right to speak and express their opinion.

Have the opportunity to listen to your partner, and vice versa. If your partner is too dominating, say that now it was time for you to talk. Focus on issues, and navigate back to the couple on the topic of the problem and instead bring up another issue which has nothing to do. Do not be silent, you should mention it if your partner already exceeded the limit.

2. Do spontaneous, do not bury
Every individual has a different type of problem. There is a direct response to the time squabbling going on, or waiting for it to subside and discussed at a later date.

Gottman said, you should give your comments on the problems that occurred at that time. Your opinions, feelings, or thoughts also deserve to be heard and must be conveyed.

3. If you still love your spouse, convey this
Always remind your partner that you still love him, even though the conflict is still occurring. Hm … probably not all couples can beat their emotion and ego, but this way is worth to try.

4. Select the phrase “Yes, I understand why,” “Okay, go ahead” or “Um …” to respond to partner
These are the words to manage a healthy relationships of marriage couples if a serious discussion or even debate occurs. Disclose the exact words or sentences to give a psychological effect to the couple. Basically, you and your partner need to train the ability to listen and understand how the partner feels to maintain the marital relationship

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